Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Happy birthday to my mom

Made a card today in honor of my mom's birthday. Of course I kind of ran out of room to put a sentiment on it, so it doesn't necessarily have to be a birthday card. I even pulled out the glitter (eek, a mess!) I'm happy though. The stamp set is called For All You Do (#115360 $23.95) and the colors are Mellow Moss and Blush Blossom.


  1. That picture was amazing

    You're gonna get yourself in trouble! But thank you, I'm not where I normally am weight wise.
    Friday 10:19pm

    Don't worry I won't get in trouble. from what I can see you are perfect weight

    Thank you. You're awefully bold today

    Yeah I get that way when I see something I like.

    Hmmm. Something tells me your eyes are starting to roam. You miss having your 20something girlfriend?

    My 20 something girlfriend didn't have a body like that

    She was cute from what I remember.
    You didn't comment on wondering eyes.

    I guess so. I'm sorry if my boldness is making you uncomfortable.

    Doesn't bother me

    Ok .

    It was just a good angled shot... I'm 15lbs overweight.

    15 pounds is nothing. Your body looks amazing. I understand if you want to lose some weight but looks perfect to me

  2. Yeah if I lose 15 I'll have my abs back completely. I honestly just have no motivation with Jason being gone. This is the first time in months I've put makeup on

    I'm sorry. I could tell you how awesome you look every day to motivate you lol

    Haha! I plan to get back to running when my roommate goes back to work. Then I won't have anyone to lazy around and watch tv and read all day with lol

    Lol that will help

    Yup. I'll run for 30 min and ride/train his horse for bout 3 hrs a day and ride mine for an hour or so. That should shock my system into shape

    Sounds like a lot of work

    Train a horse is but I love doing it! After I finish this horse I'm thinking bout buying one and training it up to sell and see how much I make.

    I don't know anything about horses

    Neither does Jason


    I'm surprised y'all didn't ride with all the farms down there

    No one near me had a lot of land or horses. Even though it was Mississippi it was still a city

    Yeah that makes sense
    Saturday 1:56am

    What are you doing in Nevada? Are you there all alone?

    I'm here with Jason's best friend Park and his family. Originally I came out to look at some pups but the bitch killed her litter so no pups. But yeah alone non the less

    Ah ok. That's a shame.

    Yeah. I'm just hanging by the pool mostly cuz I don't get the point of gambling when I can roughly estimate my odds, not good, so it's pretty lonely seeing all the couples.

    Yeah gambling is a bad thing obviously but the fun is from the chance of immediately winning not long term chances. Sucks you are lonely like that, such a beautiful and sexy woman shouldn't ever be lonely.

    Hahaha yeah I guess us math savvy ppl see the flaw in that line of thinking.
    As for your other comment, I agree and feel free to write that to Jason! It's weird turning ppl down without anyone to show for it��

    You are a very good girl.

    It was hard at first, the whole instant gratification thing, but I kno I'm not gonna get the feeling I crave cuz it's emotional.

    Yeah it's just not the same if it's purely physical I guess. Still you are very good

    It's just not worth it. Gods honest

  3. It's just not worth it. Gods honest truth Daniel Craig couldn't do it for me.

    Lol dang

    Yeah! Never thought I'd say that. Haha... It's strange how much you can want another person.

    Believe me I know. I won't keep harping on it. I look at your combination of brains me beauty and think that you should be taken care of 24 hours a day. Anyone you are tied to that emotionally and that you want that much is a lucky person indeed.

    Hmm I wish he would've thought that way before he made his choices.
    24/7 seems extreme but I'd settle for stay at home mom ️

    Lol. I'm just saying. You are a unique combination of beauty and intelligence.

    Well thank you. Michelle is lucky to have a man like you that understands a woman needs attention & affection.

    Not sure she thinks she is lucky to have me lol

    Why you say that?

    I dunno. Just don't think she appreciates me. Of course my infatuation with you probably wouldn't make her happy lol

    You should tell her you feel unappreciated. Communication is key. I finally had to tell Jason that I needed us to be intimate more often. And no I'd think not. I'm not sure id call it an infatuation more of like an attraction due to physical aspects and common interests aka math

    Attraction, infatuation, whatever lol. Jason is one of the smartest guys I've ever known but if he wasn't intimate with you often enough he was pretty dumb. Lol

    He was self conscious and that along with it not working all the time made it work less. He finally started to take testosterone

    Oh man. I've never had that problem. I'm ready to go if the wind blows lol

    Hmm again lucky Michelle . Jason's not the best sex I've ever had but he makes love the best.

    That's where the emotion comes in I guess. I couldn't match that but I could give a run for the best sex prize lol

    Haha! Someone's proud lol. The best I've had was a 35yr old guy with a daughter 2 yrs younger than me lol. I have a thing for older guys

    Not proud just confident lol. How old were you with the 35 year old?

    Confidence is key.
    I was 18.

    That's hot. . lucky ass 35 year old

    He was a pro. To the T a straight ladies man. Man whore if you will... But I was going thru a rebellious phase and acting out sexually cuz of Paul raping me.

    What made him the best? Stamina? Size?


  4. 3:02am
    Stamina I guess... Size only matters in reference to circumference not length in my opinion. He was experienced and confident when I wanted to try things like SMBD
    But was still gentle
    As creepy as it sounds he gave me structure and stability where I had only known chaos & pain (Paul raping me)

    Gotcha. Bdsm is the main thing I miss from my old girlfriend. Michelle isn't into anything too kinky. Doesn't even like her hair pulled.
    My circumference is why I'm pretty confident. Lol

    Jason's not too into it either. Hair pulling and some spanking. I had him choke me a few times but he bruised my collar bone pretty bad with his watch and he wouldn't do it again.
    Well y'all are compatible some how or baby girl wouldn't be here

    All it takes is one time to make a baby lol.

    Well, ya must've given up the 20 yr old for her for some reason then!

    Yeah I was emotionally attached to her. The 20 year old was a weird situation she was so submissive and would so just about anything I wanted but she couldn't ever take me all the way and said that sex hurt most of the time. We tried lubes and other things but it didn't seem to help.

    Hmm. So you're not physically attracted to her?

    To Michelle? I am sometimes but not as much as I was to the 20 year old. Or that I am to you. Lol. Sorry that's bad

    No it's honesty which is also a key.
    Have you tried to get her to do or look a way that attracts you?

    Yeah. She just isn't ever going to be the hot sexy girl in a two piece by the pool like you.

    Why do you say that?

    Of course I'm not Daniel Craig either lol. She just won't ever be that siZe.

    Why not? Anyone can lose weight.

    I guess that's true but I don't ever see her losing much.

    Perhaps you can encourage by working out together or getting her that lapband surgery

    I should go to sleep lol. Thanks for talking to me and listening to my crazy talk and not telling me to fuck off cause I think you're sexy and hot. Lol

    No prob. Yeah you prolly should get some rest. Talk to ya later
    Sunday 11:50am

    As inappropriate as Jason would find our convo, I've been thinking on it and wish he was more like you. He's not an affectionate or very sexual man and with him gone I crave it even more. I hope he comes home with your outlook.

    I hope for your sake he does too. Long time to wait though.

    That's what I'm struggling with. How long is too long? And if I don't wait will I regret it even if I find someone else?
    Can you answer those in three ways?
    -father figure
    -opposite sex

    What do you mean? You want my opinion on what they mean?

    I want your opinion from each of those standpoints

    The opposite sex part is a little trickier. It's a long time to wait multiple years for the emotional and physical needs you have from a partner. It's hard for the other two because I think in your situation they are combined. In general I would say the friend and father figure would be there no matter if you wait or not but it's hard to say how it would turn out.

    You're no helping

    Lol. I don't think I could wait. And it sounds like although you love him and want him he wasn't providing you with certain needs even before he left.
    If you were a stranger and I didn't know your boyfriend at all, I would say don't wait.


  5. 12:37pm
    I don't think I can leave...
    I don't kno why I bother asking for advice ��

    Lol. No one can tell you what to do. I can only tell you what I think and what I think I would do

    So by what you said love is conditional on presence

    I just think that there are needs that can only be fulfilled by personal interaction. Not just talking about sex but just the emotional togetherness. If tomorrow Michelle was going to be gone for 3-5 years I don't think I could wait on her to have someone that made me feel happy on a personal intimate level. It's possible I'm a jackass lol, but that's how I feel. Likewise if it were me going away I would tell her she had my blessing to be with someone else if she wanted.


    It's not what you want to hear I can tell but hey that's my answer. Anyway did you win at roulette

    I want to believe that love conquers all and God rewards those with patience and a true heart but then I'm conflicted by what He did to Job.
    Naw I blew 700$ but I had fun and that's what matters.

    Lol. If you go into it knowing you will lose and you are paying for fun then it's fine. I have an addictive personality I can't gamble or I spend too much

    Yeah fun is fun and it didn't break the bank so no biggy


    When are you coming back
    Sunday 2:21pm

    Going to airport now. Went thru the bodies exhibit first tho. Pretty cool

    Ah ok. I've seen the bodies stuff it's awesome

    The babies were hard to see but very educational

    Well I'm glad you had some relaxation and got some sun and fun

    Sunday 5:56pm

    I walked by a gun and ammo store and thought about you lol. They had a sale on glocks

    hmmmm yeah thats one i've yet to get. Im not fond of their style

    Lol I don't know anything about guns other than 12 gauges. I just thought of you when I walked by the store.

    really? from the south and all you kno is a 12 gauge?

    I hunted with a 12 gauge lol. When my step dad made me go. And a 30-06 sometimes too I guess.

    why do you think you are suddenly infatuated with me? Merely because of a picture I posted?

    No I've always been attracted to you. I can leave you alone if it's a problem. The picture was just another thing to like about you.

    doesn't bother me. Park likes me too and we live together so it doesn't phase me
    i just wondered where this came from and if your are "acting out" in Illinoise on your desires for a younger lover

    I don't think that I'm acting on anything. There are plenty of young women in my friends list I'm not attracted to lol

    your avoiding my subtle attempt of asking you if youre seeing someone on the side since it sounds like you are unhappy with your current sexual set up

    Oh yeah I missed that subtle attempt. Lol. No I'm not.

    i wonder if that is were you are heading



    I don't know.

    well you had to have thought about it.
    Hypothetically: if we lived in the same general area, and I wasn't faithful to Jason, would you try to hook up with me?

    I'd have a hard time saying no to that

    does that make you rethink your relationship?


  6. 7:08pm
    Lol you are trying to make me feel bad?

    not at all!
    see how aweful you feel? I feel like that when I think of not being faithful to Jason yet I've have 3+ guys from high school message me about having a drink since I posted that picture (of which I didn't think was as riske as everyone else did. I mean my thighs look HUGE for Gods sake!)
    and they are attractive young guys that could probably perform just fine in the bedroom but it still wouldn't be "satisfying" to me which brings on another onslaught of feelings of dispare and longing

    Lol your thighs look perfect. A


    I don't feel awful I guess that's a problem.

    well at least your real about it

    I guess

    I had no intension of making you feel bad

    You didn't don't worry. You're right in a lot of the things you're saying. It's probably bad that if given the chance I'd get with you in a heartbeat. But hey it is what it is.

    even me being Jason's girl?

    As long as you're faithful to him it wouldn't happen anyway as long as that's the case and I would abide by that. I'm just saying on my end there's nothing that would stop me.

    Well it's a good thing you're not Daniel Craig and I have a moral compass based vagina

    Lol. Darn to both of those
    Sunday 10:41pm

    You make it home ok?
    5 hours ago

    Yeah but my phone died

    Ah ok. Glad you made it back
    3 hours ago

    The more I go over our past few days conversation the more I find that it does bother me. I'm not offended that you find me attractive or that you would cheat in a heartbeat on Michelle with me. What bothers me is that I was so proud that I knew Jason had a friend like you that I thought was a "good man" because so many of the ones here have turned out not to be. My life has been plagued by dishonest, short sided thinking, cheating men. You have proved to be yet another one and just one more "friend" that would hurt Jason to the core if given the opportunity. This saddens me and I think it best we not personal message one another anymore. If it can't be said on the comment section it shouldn't be said.

    I am sorry, I won't message again

    You're not sorry. That's the problem

    I am sorry, and I told you numerous times I would never do anything in a hypothetical situation with you because of Jason and your love for him. It's ok, you are right I'm a jackass.

    This isn't some passive-aggressive ploy, I know I am fucked up. I need to concentrate on my family, so thanks for comparing me to all the other cheating lying men, because that's really what I need to think about and do what I can to not turn into one of them. You've helped me, even if you didn't mean to, so thanks. Anyway, I really am sorry, and you will probably see soon why I really need to change (if you stay friends with me).
    2 hours ago

    Bringing another child into the world? In my opinion it's a disservice to Magnolia and the other girls if you can't be a respectable role model in your own marriage. Another child isn't going to make you focus and "change". You're 40 something, you are what you are. End of story. Also I'll be sending all of this to Jason.

    You are right, I can't argue with anything you've said. Anyway, my last message to you.